“Man, he shoved that beer can of his so far up my ass. It was incredible.” The crass words made me blush, but they also didn’t make sense.

Why would he want a beer can shoved up his…butt?

The half-drunk guy that was stretched out on the common room couch answered my unasked question. “It was great, but I’m just saying that thing was so thick I’ve been walking funny for days. Man, no more tops with dicks that wide. I’ll take a nice long thin one any day.”

Ohhh.

“You’re such a slut.” The other voice that seemed to be coming from the floor didn’t consider that a bad thing, if I read his tone of voice right. He seemed to think couch guy was funny. But I could have misunderstood.

I wasn’t a moron, but people’s reactions, especially to sexual things…confused me.

Like, why were they even talking about it at all? The middle of the common room in the dorms wouldn’t have been my first choice of locations to have that kind of discussion. Especially when there seemed to be endless parties going on. Not that I would have talked about something like that with someone anyway.

When are you going to tell your Daddy you want to move in together?” Some days, getting Ryland going was entirely too easy.

“What?” He popped up in his bed, wide-eyed and mouth hanging open.

Sharing a room had worked out better than I’d expected, but that might have had something to do with the fact that Ryland just about lived at Holden’s place. Before we ever got frustrated with each other, he would be gone for a day or even the whole weekend. It was perfect.

I’d be sad when he actually moved out for good to go live with Holden, but they’d been perfect together from the start, so I knew it would happen sooner or later.

“Don’t give me that look. We both know it’s what you want.” He was shaking his head, but it was more like denial was his pre-programmed response rather than what he actually wanted.

“But…he…” Ryland blinked and reached over to tap his phone, looking at the time. “Um…I have class soon.”

Trying to use that as a good excuse to get out of the conversation was cute. Of course, getting him functioning had been the only reason I’d brought it up originally, but I wasn’t planning on admitting that.

“Who wants spinach and whole-wheat baby biscuits? The fruit-flavored or even vanilla ones are so much better.” The male voice was familiar, maybe that’s what drew my attention, but as the speaker continued, something had me stopping in the middle of the grocery aisle. “It’s getting harder and harder to find the good ones. Organic green tea baby biscuits are not fun.”

“Dude, you know that sounds so weird when you say shit like that.” The new voice didn’t seem surprised at the direction the conversation had taken, but I could almost hear the second young man shaking his head.

I could understand where he was coming from. Most people didn’t go around talking about eating baby cookies—at least not in the grocery store.

The first voice didn’t seem upset; in fact, the conversation had a familiar feel to it, like they’d had it before. “What? They’re good, and I enjoy doing stuff that makes me feel like a kid again. It’s like all those people who color and buy those fifty-dollar books and expensive crayons to help them relax. Same thing.”

“Um, I think there’s a bit of a difference between my mother coloring intricate designs in one of those stupid books and you eating baby cookies and watching cartoons.” There was a pause, and I heard the cart moving around. “What brand of diapers did my mother send us here for?”

I should’ve kept going. That would’ve been the mature thing to do, the right thing. But no, I stood in the middle of the grocery store, trying to look like I was debating which paper towel roll to grab, while really listening to the most curious conversation I’d ever heard in public.